Anonymous asked: How can you stand by her side even when she has a boyfriend? Do you really think she’ll stay with you if you even end up together?
Yes I know she will. All I know is she is suppose to be with me and not him. If I stop fighting for her then I know I’ll lose her again. I just can’t let her slip away so I’m holding on as tight as I can. She is so close but still just out of reach… Do you know what it’s like to have everything you’ve ever wanted right at the tip of your fingers? How could I possibly let go now? I don’t know what it is about this girl but I’ve been pulled back to her time and time again over the last 3 years and she has been pulled right back to me. I finally get it. I am suppose to be with her. It took me long enough but I get it. I’ll do everything I can to keep her in my life for as long as possible…
I started going through Collin’s tumblr, and this is from March of 2011. He went up and down about staying with me, about how I was terrible to him, then blameless, then he hated me, then he wanted me. Which is understandable. I really treated him like crap, and he was amazing for looking past all of it and still loving me. Our relationship was fickle, but we’re finally together. He’s my boyfriend. We are together. He knew we’d end up together, and he was right.
My ex was a complete dick and dumped me after 2 years over a text message! Collin is a million times better than everything I’ve ever imagined. He kind of let me go back towards the end of the year last year, but he had every right. I had said some of the most hurtful things I could ever say to him. I don’t really remember, because I tried to forget them so I could just move on and be happy with my boyfriend, but I wasn’t. As soon as I decided that I was happy (convinced myself I was, because I really wasn’t) my ex basically started to shut me out. And Collin began to move on with his best friend. I didn’t even know about it, because I tried to not look at his blog or Facebook.
He threw away everything for me when I came back. I had really come to terms with a lot of the issues I was dealing with, my self esteem, my trust, and everything. I knew that if I had decided to talk to Collin again, I had to really want it. He was completely and utterly in love with me, and I had to be sure of my feelings. I wouldn’t ever hurt him again. So about a month after we stopped talking, and how I missed him and wanted to talk to him, I didn’t, because I was still in a relationship and still wasn’t sure I could treat him the way he deserved to be. The new year was coming, and I had screwed up my first semester of college, I was ridiculously unhappy with my relationship, and in that moment, when I thought of happiness, I thought of Collin. In that moment, I knew Kyler never deserved me, or the two years I spent with him. Maybe the first few months were okay, but not anymore than that. I learned a lot about myself though, and went after what I wanted from that moment on.
I’m so much happier, and words can’t describe how thankful I am for Collin holding on to me, how patient he was, how trusting he has been to let me come back with his arms wide open. He knew we’d end up together in the end, and we did. I love him.
This was an ask sent to collin, and his response, and my thoughts on it now. :)
